Who knew a story in the Bible illustrated anxiety so well?
Quick backstory
Jacob and Esau were brothers, children of Isaac and Rebekah. Esau was the first born son, meaning he was supposed to inherit the birthright of his father. But Jacob ended up getting the birthright, so Esau was furious with Jacob and wanted to slay him. Jacob ran away from his home so that he wouldn’t be killed.*
Today’s main story
Years pass. Jacob and Esau have separate lives as they get married and have children. Then the Lord told Jacob to return to his father’s homeland. This was not an easy task since he knew Esau was living there and they’d meet again. Jacob prayed, then he sent messengers to Esau, letting Esau know that he’d be coming. When the messengers returned to Jacob, they told him that Esau was coming with 400 men.
This report scared Jacob; he “was greatly afraid and distressed.” (Genesis 32:7) He prayed earnestly to God. He didn’t sleep that night, fearfully anticipating the reunion with his brother. This is exactly what it feels like to have anxiety.
When Jacob and Esau finally reunited, “Esau ran to meet him, and embraced him, and fell on his neck, [meaning he hugged him affectionately] and kissed him: and they wept.” (Genesis 33:4) What a beautiful twist to their story!**
Moral of the story
The point here is that oftentimes with anxiety, we make assumptions and get stressed and fearful about something that may not even happen. In other words, we make up a movie in our head that’s a psychological thriller and we star in the main role as the reluctant hero, scared out of our minds. But it turns out to be fictional!
I relate to this story of Jacob and Esau. In therapy I discovered that often my anticipation of an event was worse than the actual event. For example, when I was younger sometimes I was too anxious to go to a church activity with other single adults. I was afraid I wouldn’t know anyone there and that I would be too awkward talking to new people. But whenever I went to these activities, my experience was never all that bad. Even if my body reacted as if new people were dangerous, I didn’t die. My friends have also repeatedly assured me that I’m not awkward, even if my brain thinks I am, and I need to trust that they are telling the truth.
Jacob had reason to be afraid, and so do we. But we can trust that God will help us. He can see the entire future, while we only anticipate events that are happening in the near future. We may only see the parts of ourselves that are weak, yet God sees us as a whole, lovable, wonderful child of His. As we follow Heavenly Father’s counsel, we will see His face, as Jacob did. (Genesis 32:30; 33:10)
*This backstory is a whole different story that is worth studying in Genesis 25, 27-28.
**You will get more out of Jacob and Esau’s story if you read it in Genesis 32 and 33. I invite you to read these chapters.
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